Sunday, December 20, 2009

Taking my life off 'hold'

I took this last week as a vacation week so I could get stuff done around the house, and prepare for the holidays. After I finally got the last presents wrapped and ready to go, I started to attack the piles of stuff in my bedroom. Wow! Talk about a huge amount of 'stuff'!

As I was going through some of the piles shoved further to the back, I realized there were boxes there that were five years old! As I was going through and trying to decide what to keep and what to toss/freecycle, I realized how much we had put on hold ever since Michael got his diagnosis. Our world has revolved around him for the past five years, almost to the exclusion of all else. Not that this is a bad thing - he has made such tremendous progress. But, kinda sad in another way when I look back on the things that used to matter to me.

I was talking with Steve and we realized that our life has changed so much since October. That was when we realized that Michael finally had the perfect placement (for him), and that he was incredibly happy where he is, and hopefully we have a break from fighting the 'system' to get him that placement.

October is also when we started seeing results from a new antioxidant we have been trying. Michael is happy. He's learning. We aren't having the daily battles we once did. A bad day now used to be an incredibly good one - just a year ago. I have so much to be thankful for!

So, now that we aren't in constant battle mode, there is actually time for us. We've taken a vacation. We've spent time together. Now, it's time for me to focus on my own health, and trying to get the house back. I'm not sure if there is any hope for the carpets (supplements really stain when they come back up!) but who knows, maybe the rest of the house can be guest-ready.

On that same topic, we finally broke out a new set of dishes. I had bought them soon after we moved into the house, intending to invite people over for dinner. It's a beautiful set, with all the serving pieces. But, after life started spiraling out of control, I lost hope of having guests and the set got banished to the garage. Yesterday, we brought them in, washed them all, and loaded the cabinet. Anyone want to come over for dinner? It will still be allergy friendly and life is still chaotic, but I have hope.

Does any of this mean that we are less focused on Michael and his recovery? Not at all. It just means that he is finally doing well enough that we can have other interests and maybe a few tiny moments of 'normal'. It's a Christmas wish so it has to come true, right?

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