Monday, January 12, 2009

Team Mom and Dad

When your child is first diagnosed with autism, you start assembling your team – doctor, neurologist, occupational therapist, speech therapist, special education teacher – the list seems to go on forever. But one team that often gets overlooked is the Team of Mom and Dad. I know that autism can drive a huge wedge between parents, especially if they disagree about treatment options, school choices, etc. Then, when you throw in the financial burden of just living with an autistic child, many marriages disintegrate.

I hear so many stories of fathers who can’t cope and abandon their wives to ‘deal’ with their child. So many moms are isolated and alone, trying to navigate the system by themselves. Today, I want to thank all the Dads that stick around, actively participate in their child’s education, treatment plan, and life. I can’t express how grateful that I have a husband who supports Michael in everything – he is involved in every aspect of daily life, treatment decisions, and messy cleanups. Truth be told, he handles more of the messes than I do.

I can’t imagine going through this journey alone, or with someone who disagrees about the fundamentals of treatment. I would go nuts if I couldn’t bounce ideas off Steve, see if he is seeing the same things I am, etc. Between the two of us, we have a good handle on Michael’s progress, moods, future direction. There is so much more I want to say, but mostly, just Thank you, Steve, and Happy Anniversary!


Petra said...

Happy, belated, Anniversary you two!!!

And as to the situation you eluded to..well, you learn to deal... On the boys' good days? His loss, my gain. On the boys' bad days? This too shall pass...

Anonymous said...

I really like your blog! I am on biomedheads and saw your address in your signature, and thought I would check it out. I too am a biomed mom with a husband who supports the path we have chosen for our son. I can't even imagine tackling something this huge alone.
Yeah for the Dads!

Renee said...

Thank you! I really am Lucky. I have several friends who have husbands/families who don't support them in trying to recover their children. It makes me so angry, and so sad. I really do thank God every day for Steve and the wonderful partnership we have.